Hello! It’s been a while since I got to visit my visual diary and post something… Something essential and relatable to the current situation we’re facing. Yes. COVID-19.

While we’re in the midst of this worldwide pandemic, with the entire nations frightened, it’s really taking an emotional toll, especially to me that I am already highly anxious.

Last year, on the same day, I posted about the difficulty of accepting and relinquishing certain things. They reflect on how I was managing to get by, maintaining a routine to stay “Being Okay.”

It’s foolish to claim that anyone is an expert at coping. We all struggle daily and need help. The general approach is to ‘be our own judge’ while we bear responsible for our own issues. Albeit contrary to the last sentence, I wonder, “Can’t reaching out and maintaining a good support system reasonably alleviate stress?” Perhaps this approach will make more sense if I do a story telling here now that I’m completely on board with it. Who knows, it could also shed you some light, or the people we care about help make each and every fight bearable.

While reaching the fifth paragraph, allow me to share a backstory about dealing with anxiety I did last year, describing it as a very unpleasant and disorienting experience with a somewhat melancholic tone.

Chaos turned to sanity when I made the impulsive decision to leave my 7-year professional career and return to the province with my daughter. I convinced myself that prioritizing my loved ones over my career couldn’t possibly be a bad choice, but it soon became evident that it was a setback. In hindsight, the mundane days in the province felt like being trapped in a liminal space, with each passing minute intensifying the UNFULFILLED and UNCERTAIN feeling.

Then came my eating disorder. I lost weight and my hair was thinning immensely. I thought my aging signs were literally just that bad hitting the quarter-life crisis. To combat the struggles, I attempted to take on online part-time jobs, but it only heightened my frustrations. As my stress continued to grow and my anxiety became more severe, my desperation and determination to overcome it all led me to where I am now. I began to see a glimmer of hope when I decided to re-apply for a corporate job.

While it was obviously a turning point I had to face, I also later found out that I had prehypertension, which delayed my application for days. Turmoil piled up as I hoped to be fit enough to pass my medical tests. It’s totally unbeknownst that a 28-year-old, 95-pound person like me would be at risk of high blood pressure. Absurd, right?

With the utmost fear of not getting back on track, I unknowingly surrendered to adopting a healthy routine. For the sake of my sanity, I let things be and took a much-needed time-out. Good things began to resurfaced when I started reaching out, sought healthy advice from others, and listened to podcasts. Through these, I learned that I had been too hard on myself. It dawned on me how I lost track in life once again. Since then, I have embraced Stoicism—practicing the art of letting go of what I cannot control. While it may not have entirely ceased my anxieties, I can proudly say that it has made me feel more at ease and content with what I have. This shift has straightened my priorities, my life goals, and how I would better navigate life through challenging times.

At present, while it may not always be perfect, I continue to be grateful for what life offers me. Being part of a healthcare IT provider company, I feel that one’s presence matters, especially during the current crisis (even while working from home). 😊

A pro tip:

A daily gratification:

There’s nothing more fulfilling than being with your loved ones while comfortably making ends meet.

Thank you for following along this far.

There’s so much I’d like to share in my visual diary. Unfortunately, time’s up for now! Nonetheless, I am hopeful and passionate about creating more content, so stay tuned for updates! Namaste.